Check the Facts in DBT is an emotion regulation skill that helps teens separate what actually happened from the story their mind created. Instead of telling a teen they shouldn’t feel a certain way, this skill encourages them to be curious about what they know and what they’re only guessing at.
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Check the Facts is a skill taught within the emotional regulation component of dialectical behavior therapy, also known as DBT. The skill is based on the idea that our emotions are influenced by how we interpret a situation.
Check the Facts can help teens separate what happened from how they interpreted it. They can then check whether the emotion matches what they actually know to be true. The question isn’t whether the emotion is valid, but whether the facts support the conclusion that led to the emotion.
Check the Facts in DBT is not a way to invalidate someone’s emotional experiences. It does not mean that your teen is too sensitive, that you should:
Instead, Check the Facts helps teens understand what is happening before making a decision about what to do with the emotion they’re experiencing.
Check the Facts can be broken into six steps. The exact language used in DBT may vary depending on provider and treatment setting, but the process generally involves similar steps. Behavioral Tech, an organization founded by DBT developer Marsha Linehan, emphasizes the importance of helping clients determine when emotions fit the facts.[1]
Begin by asking “What am I feeling?” and try to be specific with the answer. Instead of saying “I feel down” or “I feel okay”. Try narrowing it down to more descriptive emotions such as:
When your teen can name the feeling accurately, it’s easier to understand what interpretation might be behind it. This step helps build emotional awareness.
Describe the event as objectively as possible. For example, an objective observation might be: “My friend walked by me without saying hello” or “my partner said they needed some space tonight.”
After describing the event objectively, ask yourself: “What am I assuming about the situation?”
The goal here is to begin recognizing where the facts stop, and your interpretation begins.
This is often a case of emotional reasoning. You assume that because something feels true, it must be true. But sometimes our interpretations reflect cognitive distortions, thinking patterns that can make a situation seem more negative than the facts actually support.
Begin to brainstorm anything else that could have explained what happened. A friend who did not say “hello” when walking past may be:
This step can help your teen practice balanced thinking. It shows them that the initial assumption isn’t the only possible explanation.
Ask questions like:
Checking the facts is not designed to talk someone out of every painful conclusion. Sometimes the facts may actually support your teen’s concern, and that’s still useful to know before the final step.
The intensity of the emotional response may exceed what the facts support. But the purpose is not to determine whether or not your teen has a right to feel a certain way. The purpose is to decide what action will be most useful next.
Once your teen has worked through all six steps, there are two outcomes. Either the emotion fits what actually happened, or it doesn’t.
Sometimes your teen might check the facts and realize they have good reason to feel the way they do, and that is okay. DBT treats all emotions as meaningful information while teaching people to determine what response fits the situation.[1]
Check the Facts is not a strategy to prove that emotions are irrational. Instead, the ultimate goal is to work on responding effectively instead of impulsively.
When an emotion does not fit the facts or acting on the urge wouldn’t be helpful, there is another DBT skill called Opposite Action.
Opposite Action means doing the reverse of what the emotional urge is telling your teen to do.
Our brains are always making predictions and interpretations without us noticing. Most of the time, this is useful, but when someone is already stressed, anxious, or embarrassed, their interpretation may become more negative or threatening than the situation calls for.
Research on adolescent emotion regulation has shown that changing how a situation is interpreted is an important strategy that develops through childhood into the teenage years.[2] Check the Facts breaks that same process down into clear steps, but the underlying idea stays the same. The meaning we assign to an experience influences the emotions that follow.
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Anxiety is especially good at turning possibilities into probabilities and then probabilities into certainties.
Check the Facts can help shrink a catastrophic prediction back to its actual size by helping a teen separate possibility from probability, and evidence from assumptions. It also helps them think through how similar situations have turned out in the past.
Anger can also intensify through interpretation. For example:
This can help separate the original interpretation from the facts as a way to decrease conflict.
Jealousy often involves gaps in information. A teen sees their partner talking with someone else and their mind begins to create an entire story about flirting and betrayal.
Check the Facts can help the teen ask themselves the following questions before confronting their partner:
Fact-checking takes a clear head to think critically. If your teen is experiencing panic or overwhelming distress, then they may need to settle before checking the facts can work.
DBT includes other coping skills and techniques specifically designed for periods of intense emotional activation. One example of this is TIPP, which stands for temperature, intense exercise, paced breathing, and paired muscle relaxation. This skill can help teens manage intense emotions before trying to solve the larger problem.
Parents can support a teen’s use of Check the Facts in various ways. It’s often helpful to practice outside of highly emotional moments, which can make it easier to use when distress is higher.
Try asking: “What happened that made you think that?”
Followed by: “What part do you know for sure?”
This can help your teen begin working through steps 2 and 3 as mentioned earlier in the article.
Parents often rush to provide comfort and alternative explanations. But that can potentially come across as invalidating or defending the other person instead of your teen.
It is usually more helpful to allow the teen to do the fact-checking and come up with alternative explanations on their own.
Parents also make interpretations about their experiences and therefore have the opportunity to model this skill in real time.
You might say: “When you didn’t answer my text, I originally thought you were intentionally ignoring me. But then I realized I didn’t actually know that for sure. Can you tell me what happened?”
Check the Facts can be very useful in many situations, but it is not a substitute for professional mental health treatment. Consider additional support if your teen:
Call 911 or go to the nearest emergency department if there is an immediate risk of harm. You can also call or text 988 for crisis support.
Mission Prep provides treatment for teens experiencing various mental health conditions. Mental Health support is a phone call away – call 866-901-4047 to learn about your treatment options.
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Check the Facts teaches teens that thoughts, emotions, and facts are related, but they are not always the same thing. When teens can learn to slow down and separate what they know from what they assume, they give themselves more choices about what happens next.
If your teen is experiencing anxiety, depression, impulsivity, emotional dysregulation, and other mental health concerns, support is available. At Mission Prep Teen Treatment, we use evidence-based therapeutic approaches and innovative interventions to foster sustainable change for adolescents and their families.
Whether your teen could benefit from residential treatment at one of our locations in California or Virginia, or something more flexible like an outpatient mental health program or virtual telehealth to treat their mental health concerns, our team can help.
Mission Prep Teen Treatment accepts insurance and is in-network with most major providers. We are happy to help you check your insurance coverage for mental health care.
Contact us online or call 866-901-4047 to speak with a caring member of our team who can answer any questions you might have. Reach out for a free, no-obligation conversation.
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