Anger comes in many forms, including displaced anger. Displaced anger in teenagers is when they aim their feelings towards someone or something other than the cause of their anger.
It’s normal for teenagers to displace their anger from time to time. However, if directing anger onto people or objects unrelated to the source of their feelings becomes their regular way of managing emotions, it can become a problem.
It’s both normal and OK to feel angry, but displaced anger can damage relationships, friendships, schoolwork, and the family environment. If you or someone you love often displaces anger, it’s possible to learn healthier ways of managing it by understanding where it comes from and better ways to express it.
To help you understand displaced anger in teenagers and how to manage it, this article covers:
Displaced anger (sometimes known as “misplaced anger”) is a type of “defense mechanism,” meaning that teenagers might use it to help them cope with stress and anxiety. This means they may displace their anger because it feels safer to do so. For example, consider a teenager experiencing trouble at school with a teacher; they may fear directly expressing their frustration as it risks punishment, so, instead, misdirect it toward their parent.1
Displaced anger can provide a temporary sense of relief for teenagers. Yet, in the long run, it may damage their mental health as it can cause feelings of guilt and shame, affect self-esteem and relationships, and doesn’t help resolve the source of their anger.2
Aristotle once said; “Anybody can become angry, that is easy; but to be angry with the right person, and to the right degree, and at the right time…that is not within everybody’s power, that is not easy.” Learning how to manage anger in more constructive ways may be a challenge at the start. However, over time, it becomes easier and allows you or someone you love to express yourself in healthier ways.
Internally Displaced Anger in Teenagers: If a teen misdirects their anger internally, they get angry at themselves instead of at someone or something else. They might do so because they either blame themselves for the situation or fear negative consequences for letting their anger out. Over time, internally displaced anger can lead to mental health conditions such as anxiety and depression and maladaptive ways of coping like self-harming.
It’s clear that both internally and externally displaced anger can have serious impacts on a young person’s relationships and mental health. If you are concerned about someone you love, the following signs of displaced anger in teens can help increase awareness.
Although the signs of displaced frustration in adolescence might vary from person to person, the following are some common indicators:5
A teen with misplaced anger might become frustrated or have outbursts of anger at small annoyances – a reaction out of proportion to the situation.
Outbursts without clear triggers or frequent arguments with family, friends, or teachers may indicate that a teen is struggling to manage their emotions.
Passive aggression can be a less direct way for a teen to express their frustrations to others, such as parents, teachers, and peers. This might look like speaking sarcastically to others, giving the “silent treatment,” or saying subtly insulting things.
Throwing objects, slamming doors, or getting into fights may indicate misplaced anger.
When a teenager is fighting against their feelings of anger, they may withdraw from their friends and family. This withdrawal might come across as typical adolescent behavior, but it also may be because they’re fearful of losing control of their anger around others.
Frequently reacting defensively when questioned about their emotions, or even about unrelated issues, may be a sign of displaced anger in teens.
The following is a breakdown of the potential causes of and factors affecting displaced anger in teens:1,6
Learned Responses: The teen’s family environment and past experiences may affect how they express their anger. For example, if they grew up in a family where expressions of anger were discouraged, they may not feel comfortable showing their emotions externally and direct anger internally or towards friends. Additionally, if a teen experienced trauma or abuse in the past, they may project their anger on to more “safe” and less threatening targets.
Displaced anger, including its causes, can be daunting to understand and manage. If any of the signs and causes of displaced anger resonate with you, there are steps and strategies you can put in place to help better manage emotions.
It’s normal for a teenager to displace their anger on occasion; adolescence is a time of both physical and mental change, which can be challenging to cope with. However, if you notice any of the warning signs of anger issues in adolescents in either yourself or a loved one, the following strategies can help.
When you feel anger bubbling up, it might be wise to take a break before it escalates. If you allow your anger to take over, it can worsen the situation and cause you to lash out at someone undeserving of blame. Try taking a walk, listening to some music, or engaging in an activity that calms you. It may be difficult to remove yourself from all environments, such as the classroom, so the next step may help with such occasions.
Relaxation techniques, such as mindfulness and deep breathing, are great ways to calm your nervous system when you can’t remove yourself from a triggering situation. These techniques allow you the time to gain insight into the issue before reacting in a way you regret – and also help you better understand the source of your anger.
One-minute mindfulness is a great way to quickly and easily reset your mind and body, and it can be practiced anywhere. Pay attention to the sensations in your body, concentrate on your breathing, and notice how the feelings in your body change in response.
Another useful way of coping with your anger in the moment is to keep a list of statements or reminders about yourself to hand. Make these statements meaningful to you, for instance, “I feel angry, but it doesn’t define who I am as a person and I won’t allow it to control me.”
Alternatively, creative outlets such as art and creative writing can also provide healthy ways to understand and express anger.
Talking about how you’re feeling is a sign of strength, it shows that you are taking charge of your well-being and doing what you need to stay healthy. If you don’t know how to start talking about your anger, you could prepare prompt lines like the following:
“I know I’ve been getting angry a lot recently, but I don’t think it’s about these situations. It would really help me to know I have you to talk to.”
While each of these strategies are excellent ways of managing emotions, sometimes they might not be enough for treating redirected anger in adolescents. If this is the case for you or a loved one, therapy for teenage anger issues may be advisable.
If you or someone you know is experiencing displaced anger to the extent it’s affecting your quality of life, professional help and support is available. Therapy with a trained mental health professional can help a teen explore their anger and its potential causes, as well as develop healthy coping skills.
There is a wide range of professional support options for treating redirected anger in adolescents. A medical or mental health professional can advise on the most suitable form of therapy based on why teens have displaced anger and teen anger triggers. However, some of the most popular therapies for teenage anger issues include:
CBT’s evidence-based approach can help manage displaced anger in teenagers as it targets the thoughts and behaviors behind their emotions – as well as the potential underlying reasons.
DBT was adapted from CBT for people who struggle with strong or difficult emotions and can help with displaced frustration in teenagers by teaching practical ways of managing emotions and stress.
EMDR therapy can help teens with displaced anger process any potential underlying trauma in a safe, supportive environment.
This form of therapy helps teens to better understand their anger and focuses on relaxation techniques such as mindfulness therapy for displaced anger in youth and breathing exercises to help them control anger responses. It also targets communication skills to assist teens in expressing their needs without resorting to outbursts.
This approach can bypass barriers that sometimes happen in talk therapy for people who struggle with their emotions. It involves using creative outlets like drawing or painting to express repressed emotions and explore underlying issues.
Mission Prep’s team of trained professionals offers individualized, effective care for teens who find coping with anger difficult. We aim to understand each teenager’s needs to provide the best form of treatment, including the following options:
Residential programs for teens with displaced anger issues
Reaching out is the first step towards better health, and Mission Prep is here to help. Contact us today for support and guidance.
Find out if Mission Prep is right for you by reaching out to us and speaking with one of our admissions representatives.
