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Supporting Your Child in Treatment: What to Do and What not to Do

Author:
Jemma Strain
Jemma Strain
B.S. Psychology
Editor:
Emma Loker
Emma Loker
B.S.
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Supporting your child in treatment can feel like a minefield. Research shows that teenagers not only view their mental health from their own perspective but also through their relationships with other people. What this means is that you, as their parent, play a significant role in how your child interprets their healing and recovery.1

These findings can put a lot of pressure on parents, especially when they might already be feeling an undertow of complex emotions. If you’re worried about how to support your teen in treatment – including the “dos” and “don’ts” of what to say and do – support is available to you. Figuring out this process alone can be overwhelming, and advice and support are available to you. 

This article can help by covering the different ways to support your child in treatment, including:

  • What to do when supporting your child in treatment
  • Things not to do when supporting your child in treatment
  • How to maintain your relationship with your child during treatment
  • How to guide your child through therapy options
Supporting Your Child in Treatment

How to Support Your Child Through Mental Health Care

Parents often struggle to know how to support their child in treatment. You might worry about saying or doing the wrong thing, or even that you’ll be blamed for what your child is going through. These concerns are normal, but they can nevertheless be difficult to overcome. 

The truth is that many teenagers need mental health treatment. In fact, according to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, 20% of teens in recent years have received treatment for a mental health issue. Therefore, you are not alone in worrying about how to support your child – and nor are your child’s issues your fault.2

If you’re unsure how to go about supporting your teen, professional mental health advice can help. As can our article, “Parent’s Guide to Mental Health Support for Their Child: From Diagnosis to Recovery.”  In the meantime, the following tips on what to do when supporting your child in treatment can act as a useful guide. 

What to Do When Supporting Your Child in Treatment

When supporting your child in treatment, aim to…

Learn About What Your Child is Going Through

Mental health conditions can feel very isolating – like no one else could possibly understand what you’re going through. As a parent, taking the time to learn about your child’s condition can help you realize where their emotions, thoughts, and actions come from. Making this effort can go a long way toward helping your child feel supported and capable of recovery.3

Educational leaflets, family support groups, and reputable online resources such as the American Psychological Association and the National Institute of Mental Health, can help. Also, speaking to a mental health professional can help you learn about your child’s experiences and understand the best treatment options for their needs. 

Talk to Them About Their Goals for Recovery

Teenagers tend to feel empowered and more motivated towards recovery when their voice is considered in their treatment plan. Talking to them about their goals for recovery and asking how you can support them in achieving these can set the foundations for long-lasting change – and boost your bond.4

Help Them in Practical Ways

Certain mental health conditions change the area of the brain responsible for memory and can lead to concentration issues and fatigue. Therefore, if your teenager is receiving mental health treatment, their ability to remember information and instructions may be reduced. You can help them by creating visual reminders, such as homework or appointment lists, keeping track of medication, and reducing their chores. You could also help them prepare for residential treatment if this is something they need.11

Be Involved in Their Treatment

There’s a wide body of research that shows that family involvement in teen mental health treatment can improve mental and physical health, self-confidence, motivation, relationships, and recovery.5 While family involvement in treatment may depend on factors such as your teen’s age, mental health condition, and type of treatment, there are still ways you can be involved. For instance, you could attend appointments with them, join family therapy or support groups, or visit if they’re in inpatient treatment. A mental health professional can recommend ways that you can be involved to help your child. 

While each of these tips on what to do when supporting your child in treatment can be useful, it can be equally essential to understand what not to do. We cover these “don’ts” next.

Things Not to Do When Supporting Your Child in Treatment

When a teenager is receiving mental health treatment, even the most well-intentioned parent can inadvertently make the situation worse. Parents, generally speaking, aren’t mental health experts, so it’s important to not be too hard on yourself if you feel like you’ve made a mistake during this time. The most important thing is that you’re there for your child, supporting them and learning how to help them grow. 

Professional mental health advice is an excellent resource for a parent when their child is in treatment. However, the following “don’ts” of supporting a child in treatment can also help.

Don’ts of Supporting a Child in Treatment:

Don’t Try to Eliminate Stress

It can be tempting to try and remove all sources of stress from your child’s life when they’re coping with mental health issues – especially if they’re in treatment. Yet, stress is a normal part of life, so the best thing to do is to help your child figure out how to manage stress rather than get rid of it. Your teen will be taught useful ways of managing stress in therapy, and you can discuss how you can help transition these skills into home and school. 

Don’t Help Them Avoid Things That Scare Them

Your child may feel highly anxious about certain situations due to fear of being judged, shamed, or not being liked. While allowing them to remove themselves from these situations may temporarily reduce their anxiety, doing so can actually reinforce fear and distress in the long run. Instead of learning that, through facing their fears, the things that scare them aren’t as bad as they thought, they instead learn that the best way to cope is withdrawal. As a result, it’s possible that a cycle of depression or anxiety can worsen.6

Don’t Take Over

Trying to protect your child by making the best decisions for their situation is important – but these choices aren’t only yours to make. Teenagers have a need for self-rule and independence, so when their opinions are listened to and respected, they tend to be more motivated to receive treatment. What’s more, when their voice is considered in their treatment, they’re more likely to see improved symptom reduction. This doesn’t mean you can’t be involved in treatment appointments, it just means that a collaborative approach between you, your child, and their mental health professionals tends to work best.7

Don’t Reinforce Their Concerns

While you wouldn’t intentionally reinforce your child’s symptoms, sometimes, parents’ worries about their childrens’ mental health mean they unintentionally support negative beliefs or mental health symptoms. For example, if your child expresses a concern that treatment won’t work, try not to send the message that you too are worried this might be the case. Focus on consistently instilling a sense of hope in your child. You could even create a set of “script” lines you could use in such situations, like “I know you’re worried and I understand. But you can and will get better in time and with patience.” Hope is the tonic that many teens need to maintain treatment and recovery.8

Don’t Over-Promise

Although it’s important not to feed into a cycle of anxiety and worry, it’s equally important not to over-promise during your child’s mental health treatment. It’s good to keep expectations realistic so that they don’t feel like a “failure” or that they’ve let you down. For example, you might not be able to tell them they’ll make a full recovery in a couple of weeks. However, you can still maintain hope and optimism by letting them know that with hard work, time, and patience, they will start to feel better. 

Maintaining Your Relationship With Your Child During Treatment

No matter where your child is in their treatment journey, their needs and symptoms can shift. This means that new challenges in supporting them may arise from time to time. While you navigate these challenges, you may worry that your relationship with your child might suffer. Many parents have this concern, but the following actions can maintain your bond with your child during treatment.9,10  

  • Remember that you’re a team:     Collaboration is key for successful mental health treatment, and you and your child are on the same team. Even just keeping this in mind can help you resolve conflicts and problem-solve together.
  • Find time for fun: Although your child’s mental health is a priority, it’s not the only aspect of their life – they need time to relax and enjoy their relationship with you. Making time for activities you enjoy doing together can boost optimism and joy for you both, and can even reduce symptoms of mental health conditions. 
  • Actively listen to them: Your child may want to open up about aspects of their life unrelated to their mental health condition. It’s important that they can see themselves as more than “one-dimensional” – and that you see them this way too. Actively listen to them when they share with you and paraphrase elements of the conversation back to demonstrate that you’re engaged.
  • Don’t try to “fix” them: While it may be tempting to try and solve every problem your child encounters, sometimes, they might just want to discuss their frustrations with you. This is actually a healthy form of emotion regulation. Listen to them – without stepping in. This way, they can feel empowered in their life and validated by you. 

If you would like more advice on how to maintain your relationship with your child during treatment, a mental health professional can talk to you about steps to take for your unique dynamic. 

How to Guide Your Child Through Therapy Options

The best way to guide your child through therapy is to be aware of the best therapy options for their unique needs. Joining the assessment process and speaking to a mental health professional can help you feel knowledgeable about the most suitable options for your child. These options might include:

Therapy Options for Teen Mental Health:

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT): Guiding your child through the option of CBT could mean explaining how it’s proven to work in treating a wide range of mental health conditions. It focuses on targeting teens’ negative thoughts and actions, helping them challenge these, and building healthy ways of coping. 

Eye movement desensitization and reprocessing (EMDR): If you’re aware that your child’s previous experiences, such as trauma, are contributing to their difficulties, you could explain the option of EMDR. EMDR is an effective way of treating trauma as it changes how memories are stored in the brain, helping a teen move past trauma and form more positive beliefs.

Transcranial magnetic stimulation: Discussing the option of TMS with your child might be useful if they’ve tried treatment in the past and found it to be ineffective. TMS is a non-invasive therapy that is used to treat treatment-resistant mental health conditions. It uses magnetic fields to activate nerve cells in targeted areas of the brain – improving outlook and mood. 

Interpersonal therapy: As a parent, you’re likely more aware than anyone of your child’s patterns of communication in a relationship. If your child – or family – struggles in this area, interpersonal therapy can help them work through these issues and figure out better ways of coping to improve their mental health.

Another way you can guide your child through therapy is to discuss the options of outpatient treatment or residential treatment for their symptoms and needs. While it’s important to give your child a voice in their care, if they pose a risk to their own safety, residential treatment can provide 24/7 supportive supervision and intensive therapy. 

supporting your child in treatrment: What to Do and What not to Do

Mission Prep: Offering the Right Kind of Support for Your Child in Treatment

While understanding the “dos” and “don’ts” of how to support your child in treatment can help, sometimes this might not be enough. Dealing with mental health conditions can be a challenging experience, and sometimes you might feel like you can’t do right from wrong. 

Mission Prep can help you better understand how to support your child in treatment. Our team of licensed, empathetic professionals is well-versed in helping families cope with mental health conditions – and always strives to protect the family bond. 

We offer outpatient and residential treatment for different teen mental health conditions in various locations, tailoring each program to a family’s unique needs. If you have any questions about how to support your child’s mental health, we’re available to help. Contact us to learn more. 

References

  1. Lukoševičiūtė-Barauskienė, J., Žemaitaitytė, M., Šūmakarienė, V., & Šmigelskas, K. (2023). Adolescent Perception of Mental Health: It’s Not Only about Oneself, It’s about Others Too. Children, 10(7), 1109. https://doi.org/10.3390/children10071109
  2. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. (2025, January 31). Data and statistics on children’s mental health. Centers for Disease Control and Prevention. https://www.cdc.gov/children-mental-health/data-research/index.html
  3. Shoval, G., Chiu, J. C., Taylor, J. H., & Barzilay, R. (2022). Making evidence-based knowledge accessible to parents to promote child mental health care. Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, 61(12), 1415. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jaac.2022.03.005
  4. Van Dijk, A., Brummelman, E., & De Castro, B. O. (2023). “I’m not here to push you:” raising adolescents’ treatment engagement via autonomy support. Behaviour Research and Therapy, 164, 104304. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.brat.2023.104304
  5. Berry, K. R., Gliske, K., Schmidt, C., Ballard, J., Killian, M., & Fenkel, C. (2023). The Impact of Family Therapy Participation on Youths and Young Adult Engagement and Retention in a Telehealth Intensive Outpatient Program: Quality Improvement Analysis. JMIR Formative Research, 7, e45305. https://doi.org/10.2196/45305
  6. Holahan, C. J., Moos, R. H., Holahan, C. K., Brennan, P. L., & Schutte, K. K. (2005). Stress Generation, Avoidance Coping, and Depressive Symptoms: A 10-Year Model. Journal of Consulting and Clinical Psychology, 73(4), 658. https://doi.org/10.1037/0022-006X.73.4.658
  7. Stolper, H., van Doesum, K., Henselmans, P., Bijl, A. L., & Steketee, M. (2022). The Patient’s Voice as a Parent in Mental Health Care: A Qualitative Study. International Journal of Environmental Research and Public Health, 19(20), 13164. https://doi.org/10.3390/ijerph192013164
  8. Laranjeira, C., & Querido, A. (2022). Hope and Optimism as an Opportunity to Improve the “Positive Mental Health” Demand. Frontiers in Psychology, 13, 827320. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2022.827320
  9. Pressman, S. D., Matthews, K. A., Cohen, S., Martire, L. M., Scheier, M., Baum, A., & Schulz, R. (2009). Association of Enjoyable Leisure Activities With Psychological and Physical Well-Being. Psychosomatic Medicine, 71(7), 725. https://doi.org/10.1097/PSY.0b013e3181ad7978
  10. Thomas, P. A., Liu, H., & Umberson, D. (2017). Family Relationships and Well-Being. Innovation in Aging, 1(3), igx025. https://doi.org/10.1093/geroni/igx025
  11. Gilbert, P., & Gilbert, J. (2003). Entrapment and arrested fight and flight in depression: An exploration using focus groups. Psychological Psychotherapy, 76(2), 173-188. https://doi.org/10.1348/147608303765951203

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