Harsh Self-Criticism in Teens: What to Do About It
As much as we try to maintain a positive attitude, we all have moments when we critique ourselves. For some of us, negative thinking about our worth, bodies, clothes, school, and abilities might seem to come automatically.
During adolescence, children change physically, mentally, emotionally, and socially, which may open up opportunities for self-criticism when things don’t go the way they’d like. Yet for many teens, positive thinking can balance out the negative, allowing them to maintain a healthy level of self-esteem.
Unfortunately, some teens find breaking out of the cycle of self-criticism to be challenging, potentially leading to a variety of mental health problems. If you’re concerned about self-criticism or teen low self-esteem, a mental health professional can help your family get to the root of the problem.
This page also covers all you need ot know about harsh self-criticism in teens, discussing:
- The link between low self-esteem and Depression
- The impacts of perfectionism in adolescents
- Body image issues in teenagers
- Self-worth issues in teens
- Therapy and emotional support for teens
- Where to find professional support
The Link Between Teen Low Self-Esteem and Depression
Self-esteem is thought to be our overall attitude towards ourselves. Self-criticism could be considered an extension of self-esteem, as it is a form of punishment that we inflict on ourselves when we don’t meet internal expectations.
In this way, self-criticism and self-esteem can cause and affect each other, meaning that increased critical thinking about ourselves leads to lower self-esteem, which also promotes further self-criticism.1 This vicious cycle of negative thinking is a key feature in several theories of depression.1
Some theories suggest that children who develop a negative view of themselves are predisposed to developing depression later in life. In contrast, others argue that depression actually prompts such negative thinking patterns.1 Either way, it is clear that depression is closely tied to negative self-views and low self-esteem.
Further, studies demonstrate that depressive symptoms and self-criticism increase during adolescence – possibly because self-esteem tends to decline at this time.1 This relationship between self-criticism, self-esteem, and depression in teens is complex. But to put it as simply as possible, depressive symptoms may predict a drop in self-esteem in teens, but later low self-esteem could also predict depressive symptoms.
At the same time, changes in self-esteem could forecast differences in levels of self-criticism.1 If your child is showing signs of low self-esteem and high levels of self-criticism, understanding this complex relationship could help you better understand how to intervene.
The Role of Perfectionism in Adolescents in Self-Criticism and Low Self-Esteem
Another potentially problematic thinking style that can emerge in adolescence is perfectionism. It may be good to note that some aspects of perfectionism can serve as adaptive, while others are clearly maladaptive.2
For example, a perfectionist typically sets high standards for themself and this can motivate them to work harder. On the other hand, setting unrealistic expectations can put adolescents under too much stress and lead to feelings of failure.
One concept of perfectionism includes six dimensions: excessive concern over mistakes, high personal standards, doubts about actions, the need for organization, high parental expectations, and excessive parental criticism.3 These dimensions may demonstrate the rigid type of thinking that often underlies perfectionism.
Certain environments may especially cause these dimensions to show up. For example, certain aspects of school, like increased teen stress about schoolwork, may feed into perfectionistic tendencies.2,3 Similarly, since perfectionism places a high emphasis on failures, it is linked to social anxiety as well as anxiety about grades in teens.2,3
Multiple studies show that maladaptive perfectionism leads to increased stress, anxiety, social isolation, emotional dysregulation, and depressive symptoms.3 Further problems with emotion regulation tied to maladaptive perfectionism are a lack of acceptance of emotional reactions, problems following through on goals, poor impulse control, and limited emotional regulation strategies. It may also contribute to difficulties in identifying and understanding different emotions.3
If your child is developing more perfectionistic traits during adolescence, it’s important to determine if these traits are maladaptive. While mild tendencies can be motivating, if these traits are severe, this may indicate maladaptive perfectionism and might lead to harsh self-criticism and low self-esteem.
Self-Criticism and Body Image Issues in Teenagers
Body image is a complex concept because not only does it include our perception of our size, appearance, and body shape, but it also encompasses our emotional response to our bodies.4
Because adolescence is a time of significant physical change, teens’ appreciation, perceptions, and attitudes toward their bodies and overall appearance can play a major role in their mental health.4
Plus, the concept of rejection sensitivity is closely tied to a teenager’s body image. Those who have more positive coping skills for managing negative situations expect to be accepted, which means they tend to have low rejection sensitivity and a positive body image.4 On the other hand, when adolescents have high rejection sensitivity, they expect that they’ll be rejected by others, often leading to more self-criticism relating to their body.
A second concept linked with body image issues in teenagers is self-efficacy, or the belief that you can successfully achieve a desired result through your own intentional actions.4 Higher levels of self-efficacy are associated with a more positive body image in teens. On the contrary, low self-efficacy can be linked to body image issues in teens.4
Additionally, body image issues in teens are closely related to mental health disorders.4,5 For example, having a negative body image can lead to problem eating behaviors, such as emotional overeating, restricting their food intake, and loss of control when eating.5 These behaviors are often precursors to the development of eating disorders in adolescents. Therefore, addressing body image issues and, at a higher level, self-esteem and self-efficacy, could allow us to better manage the risk of serious eating disorders.5
Noticing changes in your child’s body image or eating behaviors and intervening early can yield positive outcomes for mental health treatment.
Self-Worth Issues in Teens
An integral part of an adolescent’s mental health is tied to self-worth. We can think of self-worth as a subdimension of self-esteem that is developed throughout our lives.6
Self-worth issues in teens are linked to mental health disorders, including eating disorders, depression, narcissism, bipolar disorder, and personality disorders.6
Based on research, two schools of thought around self-worth are:6
- Self-worth is a conditional feeling based on personal achievements, and unconditional self-worth
- That a human being is worthy just by living – self-worth does not need to be earned
Teenagers look to different sources for the development of their self-worth. These may include a need for approval, physical appearance, being better than others, achievement, love from family and friends, and moral values.6
Sometimes, relying on conditional sources of self-worth can help motivate adolescents. For example, if their self-worth is based on academic achievement, this can motivate a teen to study and, ultimately, attain their academic goals.
On the other hand, if we don’t end up meeting an external standard, we tend to criticize ourselves. This increase in self-criticism can be accompanied by negative self-talk in teens, increased stress over schoolwork, and anxiety about grades.1-6
By separating personal achievements and standards from self-worth, it is possible to prevent negative emotional outcomes like adolescent identity struggles. Embracing their unconditional self-worth promotes an identity outside of achievements, beauty, skill, and approval.6
Luckily, there are many therapeutic interventions for self-worth issues in teens. These include regulating thinking, participating in meaningful activities, accepting individual differences, practicing self-compassion, listening to music, and engaging in physical exercise for mental health.6
Plus, if your child’s low self-worth has led to a specific mental health disorder, there are treatment options that can be tailored to their needs. We discuss these in the next section.
Therapies and Emotional Support for Teens
If your child is experiencing problems with harsh self-criticism, low self-esteem, perfectionism, body image issues, or low self-worth, there are a variety of ways to provide emotional support for teens. The following sections focus on a few types of teen therapy for confidence, self-esteem, depression, and other mental health problems.
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT)
Acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) focuses on psychological flexibility, rather than targeting specific mental health problems.7 This type of therapy is based on the ability to respond to changes around you effectively by sticking to your values instead of continuing a rigid pattern of behaviors.7
There are six parts of the model of change that are emphasized in ACT: acceptance, cognitive defusion, flexible attention to the present, self-as-context, values, and committed action. Many studies report that ACT provides help for anxious teens, as well as those managing depression.7
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT)
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is a type of therapy that works on identifying, challenging, and modifying negative thought patterns.8 Some of the tools that a therapist uses for this modality are reframing negative thoughts, cognitive restructuring, and changing negative patterns of thinking.8
The ultimate goal of CBT is to develop more adaptive coping skills and foster a sense of self-esteem and self-worth. Cognitive restructuring in CBT is particularly effective in working through behaviors tied to social anxiety, decreasing self-criticism, and objectively evaluating thoughts and beliefs to ensure they are more balanced.8 CBT is often the first line of treatment for adolescent depression.1,8
Finding the right mental health support for teens can be overwhelming, but it is certainly possible. The following section provides our professional recommendations for mental health treatment in teens.
MissionPrep: Access to Mental Health Support for Teens
At Mission Prep, we want to ensure that teens and their families gain access to the appropriate mental health interventions for their needs.
We offer a variety of outpatient therapy programs, residential treatment facilities, and intensive outpatient programs (IOP). Therefore, whether your child is just beginning to show signs of harsh self-criticism or they have been trying to manage their depression, anxiety, or other mental health concern, we have the right level of treatment to meet their needs.
Contact us today to speak to a member of our team if you have any questions about what we offer or would like professional advice tailored to your child’s needs.
References
- Gittins, C. B., & Hunt, C. (2020). Self-criticism and self-esteem in early adolescence: Do they predict depression?. PloS one, 15(12), e0244182. https://doi.org/10.1371/journal.pone.0244182
- Sánchez-Moncayo, R., Menacho, I., Ramiro, P., & Navarro, J. I. (2025). Perfectionism and psychological well-being in adolescents with high intellectual abilities. Frontiers in Psychology, 16, 1617755. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2025.1617755
- Chęć, M., Konieczny, K., Michałowska, S., & Rachubińska, K. (2025). Exploring the Dimensions of Perfectionism in Adolescence: A Multi-Method Study on Mental Health and CBT-Based Psychoeducation. Brain Sciences, 15(1), 91. https://doi.org/10.3390/brainsci15010091
- Saylan, E., & Soyyiğit, V. (2024). Body image among adolescents: what is its relationship with rejection sensitivity and self-efficacy?. Clinical child psychology and psychiatry, 29(2), 479-492. https://doi.org/10.1177/13591045231188411
- Beckers, D., Burk, W. J., Larsen, J. K., & Cillessen, A. H. (2024). The bidirectional associations between self‐esteem and problematic eating behaviors in adolescents. International Journal of Eating Disorders, 57(1), 104-115. DOI: 10.1002/eat.24083
- Bırni, G., & Eryılmaz, A. (2024). Conceptual and theoretical review of self-worth. Psikiyatride Güncel Yaklaşımlar, 16(2), 327-346. doi: 10.18863/pgy.1336880
- López-Pinar, C., Lara-Merín, L., & Macías, J. (2025). Process of change and efficacy of acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT) for anxiety and depression symptoms in adolescents: A meta-analysis of randomized controlled trials. Journal of Affective Disorders, 368, 633-644. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.jad.2024.09.076
- Takdir, A. M., Darusman, M. R., & Devi, D. F. (2025). Transforming negative thoughts into self-confidence: The impact of cognitive restructuring on adolescents. Journal of Psychological Perspective, 7(1), 19-28. DOI: 10.47679/jopp.719982025
