Confidence Building for Teens: Growing Self-Esteem and Strength

Published: 06/10/2026 | Updated: 06/10/2026

Authored by: Louise Hartnett, B.A.

Edited by: Michael Fegan, B.A.

Low self-esteem in teens can have a huge effect on mental health, daily life, and general well-being. For example, less confident teens might avoid participating in extracurricular activities, take criticism personally, and try to change themselves to fit in.^[1]

Many teens will struggle with self-esteem because they’re navigating new challenges, figuring out their identities, and under pressure to perform at school. However, some will also experience bullying or face problems at home, which can contribute to self-esteem issues.

Building confidence in adolescents is possible with improved emotional support and some bravery to try new things. Understanding how self-esteem in teenagers develops, and what can undermine it, can help parents and caregivers provide that support. This article will explore how self-esteem can be nurtured in teens by discussing:

What self-esteem and confidence are.
The signs that social confidence in teens is high or low.
Common causes of low self-esteem in teens.
How teens can work on improving self-esteem.
How caregivers can support teen self-worth development.
When therapy for low confidence in youth may be helpful.

What Are Confidence and Self-Esteem?

Self-esteem is someone’s appraisal of their own value; it’s your sense of how much you’re worthy of approval and appreciation. Self-esteem is connected to self-confidence, but it’s slightly different. Confidence is how much you trust yourself to:^[1]^[2]

Solve problems.
Deal with challenges.
Complete tasks or activities.

While confidence is often influenced by external achievements, such as school grades or a running personal best, self-esteem is generated internally. Good self-esteem is a built-in sense that we’re worthy of love, have positive qualities and attributes, and an acceptance that we’re still OK even if we’re imperfect.^[1]

Signs of High Confidence in Teens

When a teenager has high self-esteem, they tend to:^[3]

Like and value themselves.
Believe in themselves and what they can achieve.
Know they deserve to be treated well by other people.

Other signs of self-esteem and social confidence in teens include:^[4]

Not fearing failure or feedback in school and extracurricular activities.
Knowing the difference between confidence and arrogance.
Not habitually people-pleasing or seeking approval.
Able to set boundaries with toxic friends or peers to protect themselves.
Can voice opinions, needs, and preferences at home and in school.
Being assertive without being pushy.
Being accepting of who they are.

Teen personal growth and confidence develop together, and as young people master new challenges and build supportive relationships, their sense of self-worth tends to strengthen. Confident teenagers are more likely to:^[3]

Stand up for themselves.
Try new or difficult things.
Take care of their own well-being.

Signs of Low Confidence in Teens

Confidence and self-esteem can directly influence overall well-being, making it highly relevant to teenage mental health.^[1] Furthermore, low self-esteem is linked with poorer physical health in adult life, as well as lower economic success and higher levels of criminality.^[2]

When teens are lacking in confidence and self-esteem, they’re more likely to experience difficulties with their mental health. If this is the case, they may show some of the following signs of low self-esteem:^[1]^[3]

Not wanting to contribute to discussions in school or at home.
Taking criticism personally.
Being dependent on other people’s opinions.
Avoiding taking risks or embarking on challenges.
Believing other people are better than them.
Dwelling on past mistakes or missteps.
Feeling nervous or anxious about communicating with other people.
Being highly critical of other people when they make mistakes.
Avoiding making new friends or trying new hobbies.
Feeling unhappy about the way they look.
Wanting to change themselves to fit in.

Recognizing these patterns early is important because low confidence in teens can benefit from help before it becomes entrenched.

Why Do Teens Have Low Confidence?

Unfortunately, many teenagers struggle with their sense of self-worth and have low confidence in themselves. There are many psychological and social factors for why self-esteem in teenagers can be low. Some of these causes are part and parcel of being a teenager, while others are additional pressures that not all teenagers will face.

Causes of Low Self-Esteem in Teens

Common factors driving teen self-esteem issues include:^[1]^[2]^[4]^[3]

Excessive social media use.
Excessive and unfair criticism and disapproval from friends, family, or teachers.
Lacking money of their own.
Coming from a low-income household.
Not having a father or father figure.
Having a personality that’s not yet mature.
Emotional instability during adolescence.
The pressure of social norms, such as those for body image.
Lower scores on the Big Five personality traits (extroversion, emotional stability, conscientiousness, agreeableness, and openness).
Not yet mastering hobbies and new challenges.
Being bullied, discriminated against, or abused.
Experiencing difficulties with mental health or puberty.
Facing problems at home, school, or in relationships.
Traumatic experiences.

Some of these factors are a natural part of being a teenager. When a teen is in the process of maturing, they may want things that they’re not yet able to have. For example, their own money to buy clothes or to be excellent at playing the guitar.

If young people don’t yet have the money or experience to achieve these goals, they may feel frustrated or dissatisfied. These feelings can contribute to low self-esteem, particularly if the teen hasn’t learned self-acceptance or other factors are causing persistent self-doubt and negative self-talk.

Some other factors that contribute to low self-esteem can be difficult to avoid. These include:

Having a highly critical parent or teacher.
Engaging excessively with social media.
Being exposed to social pressures about body image.

These factors increase the risk of low self-esteem but aren’t present for all teenagers.^[1]

Confidence building for teens often involves addressing and managing some of these contributing factors, which we explore next.

How Do Confidence and Self-Esteem Increase?

It can be helpful to think of self-esteem like a muscle; like most life skills, it strengthens over time through gradual efforts and needs to be maintained.^[1] Teens can take certain actions to improve their self-esteem, and caregivers can also provide support for this process. Crucially, both need to understand the building blocks of self-esteem. These are:^[1]^[5]

Self-concept or self-image: The perception someone has about themselves, which is a culmination of their thoughts, preferences, tendencies, habits, hobbies, skills, and weaknesses that they believe to be true.

Self-meaning: Someone’s sense of purpose in life, which may come from work, spirituality, or relationships, or a mixture of the three.

Self-identity: How someone defines themselves and their values, roles in life and relationships, abilities and goals, and what they stand for in life.

Caregivers and teens themselves can cultivate good self-esteem by addressing these factors.

Are their thoughts about themselves accurate and true? Do they have strong relationships and a sense of purpose? What are their values, and do they come from within or are they influenced by other people?

Exploring these questions can support teen empowerment and confidence. Self-image improvement in teens often begins with examining whether their beliefs about themselves reflect reality.

How Teens Can Increase Their Confidence

Improving self-esteem will involve both practical lifestyle changes and addressing your internal thoughts and values. Two important parts of building self-esteem and emotional strength in teens are:^[3]

Self-compassion: Though it can be really difficult, being self-compassionate means giving ourselves the same kindness and understanding as we’d give a friend. It means appraising situations fairly, cutting yourself some slack, and remembering your good qualities.

Self-acceptance: When we accept who we are, self-esteem can increase because we’re likely to be less harsh and more appreciative of ourselves. Self-acceptance means believing we all have strengths and weaknesses, and that that’s totally OK and normal. This attitude is a sturdy basis for when challenges come your way, because you’ll be less hard on yourself for having limitations.

Sometimes we have to lean on other people to support us through difficult times. It can have a positive effect on our self-esteem if we’re treated with kindness and respect and feel heard by others.^[3] That is why it is important to choose your support network carefully. If a particular friend tends to be a poor listener and gives harsh advice, don’t go to them for support.

Another way to boost self-esteem is to learn new things. Though daunting at first, learning a new hobby can have a positive impact on:^[3]

Confidence.
Mental health.
Your social life.

Research suggests that excessive social media use can be a risk factor for low self-esteem.^[1]^[3] Cutting down your usage or leaving social media entirely can be a powerful way to reduce its influence over your self-image. You’ll also receive less input from other people, such as body image standards, allowing you to touch base with your own values and preferences.

How Caregivers Can Nurture Teen Confidence

From challenging self-deprecating thoughts to suggesting confidence-boosting strategies, caregivers can do a great deal for teen self-worth development.

Since your teen’s self-esteem is tied up in their self-concept, lots of support can address this. As explained above, the self-concept is what someone believes about their:^[1]

Habits.
Preferences.
Weaknesses.
Strengths.

Self-concept is not always accurate, and this can show up in self-talk.

Challenging self-talk is a concept rooted in cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT), which suggests that negative thoughts perpetuate the cycle of low self-esteem.

If you notice your teen say things about themselves that are overly harsh, black and white, or simply untrue, you can gently challenge them. It can help to say, “I think you’re being overly hard on yourself there” or give evidence that disproves what they’re saying, such as pointing out a time when they did well.

Another way caregivers can support the self-esteem of their teen is to counteract the causes driving their confidence problems. For example, the teen may be having difficulties with body image due to:^[3]

Not seeing their body type in the media.
Receiving comments from friends or family.
Social media pressures.

If you suspect these are contributing to their low self-esteem, you can challenge these narratives and promote body positivity in your everyday language.

And finally, explore whether your teen wants some practical support for their self-esteem. If they’re open to your suggestions, you can give some advice to address their self-identity and self-meaning, which can support their confidence long-term.

For example, encouraging them to start a new hobby or sports team, or to write down a few positive things about themselves every day. These practical strategies can support self-esteem long-term and challenge negative beliefs they may have about themselves.

Are You or a Loved One Struggling with anxiety, depression, or other mental health concerns?

Mission Prep is here to help you or your loved one take the next steps towards an improved mental well-being.

Find Therapy to Grow Your Teen's Self-Esteem

Improving self-esteem in teens is possible, but it can be impeded if the confidence issues are connected to mental health conditions like depression and anxiety. When these conditions aren’t addressed, it can be very difficult to improve self-esteem, as these other factors contribute to a lack of confidence.

While parents, teachers, and caregivers can do a great deal to boost low confidence in teens and help strengthen them emotionally, some teens will need professional support.

Teens who receive professional mental health and self-esteem support can dedicate more time to what they’re working through and develop sustainable plans for managing negative self-talk and low confidence.

At Mission Prep Teen Treatment, we use evidence-based therapeutic approaches and innovative interventions that provide support and sustainable change for adolescents and their families.

To best serve each adolescent, we offer tailored treatment programs at various levels, including residential and outpatient mental health programs.

Learn more about Mission Prep Teen Treatment and how we can help support you and your family by contacting us online or calling us at 866-901-4047. Our compassionate team is available 24/7 to answer your questions and provide guidance with no obligation.